So, as always, when things start to actually look positive and things seem to be going well, my brother has to go and fuck things up. Always happens, and I am the only family member to actually realize it always will happen. I know this is horrible to say, and 99.99999% of people could never even fathom it, but I would be quite happy if he just up and disappeared. The only way I would be sad at his death is because my parents and K would be sad.
After a great concert weekend with my friend, a trip to see family and take the kids to Wonderland, a local amusement park and time on the beach we come home to more new news. First off, that evening mom came into my room and told me that K and his fiance had broken up and that she wanted to tell me to keep me up to date with what is going on (that is a first in my life!). She told me that he has not been using but that he is going to go and give NA (Narcotics Anonymous) another go to get his life straightened around. Apparently his fiance had cheated on him with one of his friends that lived with them and he had proof. She also told me that the fiance and friend had been smoking a lot of pot. I basically bit my tongue to prevent an "I told you so" and then got mad that they knew this was going on yet they still allowed my nephew to go over to the place. Apparently it was never when the friend was around but still really bothered me. This was on Tuesday.
On Friday K showed up at the house and apparently told my nephew that he had broken up with his fiance and that he was going away for a while to get his life back on track. Nothing more was said. My mom was having trouble with her facebook because K had used her computer to check out his facebook. My parents went out for dinner that night and my nephew was at a dance so I figured I would go on and get my mom's facebook all set up the way it should be for her. Well I looked around a bit and found a post from my brother stating that he was so messed up this time and couldn't believe how erratic he could get and that he was 5 days clean at the time. That had been posted on the Wednesday so he apparently got clean on Friday (20th). Once my parents got home and I got mom alone I flat out told her that either K was lying to them or that they were lying to me and told her about the post. She claimed she knew and was going to talk to me about that and apologize. Why apologize? Well I had been telling her for months that K was on something. His behaviour clearly showed that he was using something but no one had believed me. My nephew even told me one night that his dad (K) chewed up his pills before swallowing them. I told mom about this (my nephew told me this around the end of June) and she confronted K about this and he told him that it was just Tylenol and that he was trying to show my nephew how he could take pills easy (my nephew has issues with taking medications). K told mom that he couldn't be on anything because his job did random drug testing. I called him on that lie (he was off work at the time for once) but mom believed him. I pointed out specific erratic behaviour and she said that yes, in hindsight it was easy to see. I basically started to cry and said that I was getting sick and tired of being the 'bad person' and getting into fights because I was the only one who could see through K's lies but no one else would accept it. I was told that it was okay and that he had gone off to a larger city (about an hour away) to check himself into detox and that he would be staying there for awhile to get things sorted out.
On Sunday I woke up because my dog was barking like crazy and no one was letting him out. I got up and went upstairs to find the lovely sight of my brother, mom and nephew in my mom's room talking. He stayed for a few hours or so and then left again. Apparently he told mom he was back in town that day because he was starting back to work and the doctor had given him the go ahead to go back to work but because he had been off so long that he had to come back and go through training again (on a Sunday? I don't buy this lie). Mom and I exchanged quite a few words about it that day but nothing too momentous.
Then today. Mom, my nephew and I went in to town today to do my nephew's back to school shopping, go to see Ice Age 4 in 3D, do some other shopping and get some supper. K became a topic of conversation so I took me chance and asked if anyone even knew where he was. Apparently he went to the detox center an hour away but they wouldn't take him because he wasn't 'sick enough', he had no where to stay in our hometown so was going to stay in the larger town (where the detox was, about an hour away). But he had been back in our town to go through re-training for his job and that he was having problems because he couldn't get welfare in bigger city. So many contradictory stories that no one else can see through. Anyways, we had a good day out (dad was at a car show about 3.5 hours away) and we unloaded the car and brought everything inside. I went down stairs to get my PJ's on and put my stuff away and came upstairs to find mom checking the voicemail messages. This is basically what we heard:
"Hi Dad, it's K. Umm, I am in the ICU in [hometown] (laugh), umm I did a bad testosterone shot in my leg and they diagnosed it as a flesh eating virus. Umm, [fiancee] is my emergency contact but I can't find her so can you find her let her know what's going on. Oh, I can't get welfare in [big city] so I don't know what's going on. Oh, also I am calling you because my truck is parked out in front of emerge and I need someone to go get it." (First Message)
"Hi Dad, it's me again. Umm I can't get in touch with [fiance], she's listed as my emergency contact and you guys are second. Could you drive over to her place and tell her that K's got a flesh eating virus and doesn't know if he is going to live or not? They are going to take me to the OR within the hour. Can you call [fiance] at [phone number]. Tell her that I love her and if I survive this or not I still love her. I love you guys too. And [my nephew] and [me]. Man I never saw this coming." (Second Message)
So of course with dad not home, it's just mom by herself to figure this all out. She goes and finds the number to the hospital and calls ICU. Apparently he did a steroid injection in his leg and got a flesh eating virus in it (I assume it was a dirty needle, he already has Hep-C from this). They took him into surgery and removed all of the affected area that they could see. He is in the ICU hooked up to a ventilator and sedated and they will do another operation tomorrow to see if they missed any areas. Then mom had to call the police to let them know about the truck as she couldn't go and get it until my dad got home. She tried a few times to get in touch with the ex-fiancee but all she kept getting was the answering machine for the guy who she slept with when she cheated on him and didn't leave a message. Dad got home and they went back in to town to get his truck and that is where we are now. He always manages to get himself into trouble but no one wants to admit that it is his own fault because of the many bad decisions he has made throughout his life. It is all because of him and only him.
This is where I get upset. When I went downstairs to talk to mom right after she got off the phone with the ICU nurse (she also changed his emergency contact information to be them and not the fiancee) she said she didn't know what was going to happen. He has no where to go in the big city and can't get welfare and he has no where to stay here when he gets out. He is her son and she can't just see him released out of the hospital and on to the streets. I just told her to remember who the number one priority was (my nephew obviously) before she makes any decisions. I honestly do not know what I would do if he comes and moves in here for a while. I literally get physically sick being around him and could not tolerate him staying here. His few hours a week visiting my nephew is bad enough! Well I guess I should get to bed as it will be a long day tomorrow.
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